It's a time-honored threat: "Just wait 'til your father comes home!" But these days, some believe that old threat has been turned on its head. Today's dads, they say, are more likely to be the permissive ones, too intent on having fun with their kids; leaving all that unpleasant discipline to mom. It's the Disneyland dad syndrome, without the divorce.

Author and parent educator Elizabeth Crary says she doesn't believe that there are gender-specific styles of parenting. But the important thing, she says, is that parents often believe there are. "I think parents often generalize - men are that way; women are that way - out of personal experience rather than wide experience," she says. A person's temperament probably plays a bigger role in parenting style than gender, Crary says. "If a parent is very persistent, it's easier to hold limits. If a parent is very sensitive to a child's emotion, it's harder."

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